How to Be the Main Character of Your Life

Earlier this year, someone on TikTok made a video talking about this idea of how to be the main character of your life.

And it blew up.

It's funny, isn't it? How someone can put into words a feeling that so deeply resonates with people all over the world, and in an instant, a movement is started. "Main character energy", "main character aesthetic", and "how to be the main character of your life" are now popular trends and searches everywhere. 

As soon as I began thinking about it, I knew I needed to write this post. I have never phrased it this way before, but living like the main character in your life has been something that I've spent a lot of time dwelling on. I'd actually argue it's the same principle as the idea of intentional living (and you KNOW how I feel about that!)

I won't spend too much time here, because I'm SO EXCITED for you read this post, with 5 really important ways to be the main character of your life, I hope this is a valuable resource & an inspiration to change your everyday!

How to Be the Main character of your life

1. Live with purpose

The first step to some major main character energy is to live with purpose. As the main character of your life, one of the worst possible things you can do is to let it pass you by. The idea of intentional living is often associated with things like minimalism, selling your possessions and travelling the world, or dramatically changing your lifestyle in other ways.

Those are all accurate examples, but really, all it means to live intentionally is to put into practice the priorities that you already think you have. 

As the main character of your life, the goals, desires, and accomplishments you hope to see happen are up to you to work towards. That does not mean that you should dedicate your life to the hustle, spend all your time working for a medal, or seek to put your identity in things that don't matter. But if travel is a #1 priority in your life, set aside a travel fund. Get a side job to start saving. Maybe research some ways to travel on the cheap, and see what your options are for working remotely.

Know what you want, and don't be afraid to look for it. If you're not sure where to get started, check out these articles we've written to help you figure out your purpose and put it into action:

1. How to Find Your Purpose in Life

2. How to Live Intentionally

2. Set boundaries

While you're learning to be main character in your life, you need to develop confidence and comfortability in setting boundaries with other people. You know what you want, and what's important to you -- and you need to be okay with removing things and relationships that don't allow you to maintain those.

Don't dip just because you hit a rough patch, or tell someone off because they looked at you wrong - but don't be afraid to insist on being treated well. If someone can't support the journey that you're on, and they're unwilling to respect the boundaries you set over your life, it may be time to walk away. 

For more on setting healthy boundaries, click here.

3. be an enthusiast

"I began to realize how important it was to be an enthusiast in life. He taught me that if you are interested in something, no matter what it is, go at it at full speed ahead. Embrace it with both arms, hug it, love it and above all become passionate about it. Lukewarm is no good. Hot is no good either. White hot and passionate is the only thing to be."

Roald Dahl

I don't know about you, but when I read this quote, all I can think is "So... be the main character of your life." I've loved these words since long before the idea was TikTok trendy, but I'm glad we're talking about it more and more!

Knowing how to be the main character of your life doesn't just mean that you need to know what you want. It means you need to know what things you love and you need to let yourself love them. 

Get excited. About life. About waking up in the morning to a day filled with purpose, people, and passion. The things in your life that you don't like? Love them, be thankful for them, or move on to something new. 

Cultivate a spirit of FUN and happiness in your heart and life. Mindset is everything. You won't always be able to change your circumstances, or even predict what's going to happen -- but if you can master this mentality, it doesn't matter.

4. Prioritize relationships

Good people are hard to come by. So when you find them and have them in your life, fight for them. Experiences are fun, passions are exciting, but people are everything. Relationships themselves make life worth living, so make these an absolute priority in your life. 

As you embark this journey of learning how to be the main character in your life, don't lose sight of what really matters. Keep in mind that other people need to be the main character of theirs too, and as much as you need to live your own life, being a supporting character for someone else too isn't a bad thing. You can do both.

Show up for the people you care about, love them well, and fight for the kind of friendships and relationships that you want. (If you want to read more on intentional relationships & friendships, this is something I'm SUPER passionate about, so click here or check out our IG.)

5. Don't live in fear of failure

If you're going to be the main character of your life, this is one thing we need to get clear right away. The fear of failure isn't just a fear, it's a paralytic. It will take you down and hold you there. It will keep you from trying, learning, and living at all.

The bottom line is this -- you cannot be the main character of your life and at the same time refuse to take risks. It's simply not possible.

Think about it this way - what's your favourite story? Book, movie, fairy tale? Whatever it is, I'm willing to bet big freaking money that the main characters take some huge risks. I'm also willing to be that they screw up. And we love it.

Because it's us. We see ourselves in it. Our humanity, our brokenness, and when we see them get back up - see them win - it makes us feel like that's a reality for us too. 

And it is, if you try.

If you jump. If you feel the fear and do it anyway. If you embrace the role of the  main character and choose to take a risk, knowing that failure only ever results in a lesson.

a warning

Something to keep in mind while you're learning to be the main character in your life...

Not everything is about you. I know, I know--harsh, and also seemingly contrary to the whole point of the article. But being the main character does not also mean being self-obsessed or self-centred. You can understand that you only live once, and that doing it well matters greatly, and also know that there are important things in life than your own instant gratification.

I don't say that because that's where you are, or because I think that being the main character will force you into it. Only to be careful. As you determine your priorities, don't forget to make space for other people on that list. 

Life is short, but it's also long, and living it selfishly will only hurt you in the long run. WITH THAT SAID -- I have absolute confidence that you are going to master being the main character of your life. This is an important and exciting journey, and I'd love to hear about what you're working on and growing through right now.

Drop me an email at anika@outofthehabit.com or DM me on Insta & let's connect!