This post is all about how to reinvent yourself.
Whether you're feeling stuck, realizing you're not where you want to be, or simply searching for something more - a new chapter is before you.
Reinventing yourself, starting over, resetting your life - whatever you want to call it, it's all the same. Reigniting your passion for life through real, honest, intentional growth, and pursuing a life that will lead you to joy.
I've been where you are, and I know how it feels to crave more from your life. Reinventing yourself is a beautiful process, one that you'll probably repeat many times throughout your life. Each time is an opportunity to pursue wholehearted living in a way you never have before.
If you're ready to start living as the person you were meant to be, get out of your rut, and start fresh - this article on how to reinvent yourself and get fresh start in life is for you.
what you need to know before you reinvent yourself:
The process of starting over - reinventing yourself, launching a new chapter, stepping into a brand new phase of life - is exciting. It's exhilarating, especially if you're coming out of a season where you felt stuck.
But before you reinvent yourself completely, you need to understand a couple of things:
1. Reinvention does not solve low self-esteem.
If the desire to reinvent yourself comes out of an unmet need or a lack of confidence, this won't solve it. I hate to break it to you, but it's true. That doesn't mean that making changes in your life won't help you develop a healthier mindset (they absolutely will), but if you're trying to earn the love of yourself or someone else, this isn't the solution.
2. Reinvention does not undo trauma.
The times in my life when I have most craved a fresh start are the times in my life when I wanted to escape something. A bad breakup, a job that didn't pan out, a devastating end to a friendship. It's a natural feeling, running from pain. But while there's wisdom in using your past to launch you into the future, avoiding it does you no good.
If you're reinventing yourself, know why. As the great lyricist Hannah Montana write - you can change your hair and you can change your clothes, but you'll always find your way back home. You are you, and nothing can alter that. This is a good thing!
Seasons of transition are actually better to make changes in - so if you're reeling from something hard, it may genuinely be a good time to grow. Just don't do it to escape. Keep healing while you go.
1. Identify what (if anything) is specifically making you feel stuck.
Before we get started, take some time to think through what might be prompting this. Are there any specific parts of your life that are dragging you down? A toxic relationship, an unhealthy circle of friends, a job that's sucking the life out of you?
The answer might be no - which is fine! But if there is anything that stands out to you, consider first what you may need to do to address that issue before moving on to what's next.
2. identify what (if any) parts of your life yoiu want to remain as they are
By contrast, are there any parts of your life that stand out as things you want to maintain at all costs?
Think through an average week in your life. What routines, relationships, and hobbies are things that wake you up? What makes you feel alive? What do you do that makes you feel like more of yourself?
If anything comes to mind, write it down or make a note on your phone. Finding things, people, and activities that bring you closer to your truest self is immensely important to making it actually happen.
How to reinvent yourself at any stage of life
1. Figure out who you want to be.
If you ask me, this is where things start to get fun.
In order to know how to reinvent yourself, you need to figure out what exactly that means to you. And thus, you must ask yourself one of the most important questions you ever can:
Who do you want to be?
This question is everything. The answer is often complex, changing over time, and sometimes only a fraction of the whole picture. But in order to grow towards anything, you need an answer of some kind.
I'm a dreamer, through and through, which is partly why this question is SO fun for me. But I also really believe in the power of specific vision. It's an incredible thing, to know what you're working towards, and even better to know who you are becoming.
This dream - this idea of where you want to end up - is the foundation to success in reinventing yourself. It's what gives you the energy to get started, the motivation to keep going, and the courage to do the damn thing.
If you're not sure where to start, I break this process down in more detail in the first chapter of my book, Out of the Habit! You can find the paperback and ebook here, or grab a FREE chapter by signing up for my email list!
2. Identify specific habits/behaviours that you want to inhabit.
I was a theatre kid growing up. I've always loved acting, and was lucky enough to spend my childhood in an area where there was tons of opportunity for local camps, competitions, and classes. One of the coaching lines that always stuck in my head was the idea that every actor should know what their character would eat for breakfast.
It's a simple way to break down the intimate relationship an actor forms with the character they play. In order to really portray someone else, you have to become them. And in order to become a new person, you need to get to know that person really, really well.
So when you look at the future version of yourself, ask this: what would they eat for breakfast?
How do they spend their time? What does their health look like? How do they contribute to their relationships? What hobbies, practices, and personal development steps have they taken?
The truth is, you are what you do. And reinventing yourself means assuming a new set of habits, behaviours, and characteristics that will cause you to become the version of you that you're ready for.
3. Identify specific habits/behaviours that contradict that identity.
Once you have a clear vision for the identity that you're stepping into, it's time to break down the habits and behaviours you already have.
Some will already fit your new identity - lining up with the future you're building. And some will contradict it.
For example: a couple of years ago, I found myself in a situation probably not unlike your own (assuming you clicked on and are reading this post because it relates to you). I desperately wanted a fresh start. I wanted to reinvent myself, but in a way where I became simply a truer version of who I was made to be.
Part of my vision was to become more disciplined. But I also had a habit of laying in bed well past my alarm until I was running out the door.
Not only was this one habit not representative of discipline, but it actually contradicted the idea entirely. It put me in a bad headspace to start the day. I was running to catch up before I even left the house, and by the time I'd get to work, already felt discouraged enough that I didn't feel like trying or working hard.
You can see how easy it is for little behaviours to derail fresh starts. As James Clear, a habit expert, explains in his book Atomic Habits, launching new patterns isn't just about the patterns themselves. It's about becoming the kind of person who exhibits those behaviours.
Currently, my husband and I are working on getting back into a routine at the gym. But instead of telling ourselves "let's try and hit the gym this week," we've started using the verbage "we are gym people." Instead of asking if the other person is up to going, we ask questions like, "what time are we leaving?" - as if us going to the gym was inevitable.
Identity changes behaviour much faster than behaviour changes identity.
4. Set specific goals
As motivated and excited as you may feel at the prospect of a fresh start, don't overwhelm yourself. Setting a few specific, trackable goals at a time is the best way to implement behaviour change.
Pick 1-3 things you want to start or stop immediately, and come up with realistic plans of how to accomplish them.
You can read a detailed breakdown of how to do this here: How to Set Successful Goals & Achieve Them.
5. Take Action
In the wise words of one Steve Harvey: "You got a great life is in front of you. But, your great life is in front of you. It's not behind you."
If you're feeling the itch to leap into the unknown, don't ignore it. Don't wait until everything's perfect or it's easy or comfortable - you'll be waiting a lifetime.
If you're ready to reinvent yourself, to begin a new chapter, start today, and don't look back.
how to make a fresh start stick
1. The power of transition
The best time to change your life is when your life is already changing.
Seasons of transition - moving, breakups, new jobs or routines - actually make it easier to form new habits. We are such creatures of pattern that even our little unconscious actions are tied up with our big ones, so when the big ones shift, they can fall apart and scatter - making it the perfect time to shift.
As it turns out, there's something to be said for New Year's Resolutions after all - changing your life in January is easier than it is in the middle of the year. Building new habits when the calendar flips to a new month is more attainable than mid-month.
If you start a goal on a Monday, research has shown that you're more likely to follow through than if you launch on a Wednesday (how wild?!).
2. Environmental changes
If you're reading this and you're not in a season of transition - that's okay. It helps, but it's not the key to success. Still, you can create environmental changes that mimic the effect of transition seasons.
Changing up the layout of your room or apartment, making new friends and relationships, trying new foods or hobbies can all create that same sense of newness and beginning that is so effective in helping you launch a new start.
This January, after 9 years of bleaching my dirty-blonde hair almost platinum, I went red. It was a huge change, and I love it. Part of my motivation was honestly that I felt stuck. The hair was certainly not at fault, but when I looked in the mirror and saw myself at 16, it didn't help.
The change in hair colour didn't alter my value, but it did give me the feeling of a fresh start and helped me jump into some new habits and exciting beginnings with renewed passion.
3. Accountability
If you're changing your life, talk about it.
The more you say out loud what you're doing, the more you'll start to believe it's possible. The people who love you will want to support you, and you even be surprised at how reinventing yourself can inspire other people around you to do the same.
Additionally, this creates a bit of external accountability, and that can be a really, really good thing. It's powerful and important to know that other people are aware of your goals and are cheering you on towards them.
4. More resources
This post on how to reinvent yourself and get a fresh start in life is not complete, because it never could be. Each journey is unique, and your path will be your own.
I hope this has given you some footing, though - a sense of direction, purpose, and belief that you can do this.
And also... you don't have to do it alone.
My blog is filled with posts, resources and articles on how to do just this - create an intentional, meaningful, fresh start in life. Here you'll find breakdown of psychological hacks to make your life easier, bucket lists and date ideas to create more fun in your life, and recommendations for products, books and more to fill your lifestyle with the beautiful and the powerful.
Over on Instagram, my DMs are always open, and my page is a collection of all of the above, along with my life as a content creator/writer trying to create an intentional lifestyle.
Hope to see you over there - for now, know that I'm cheering for you on this journey and that I'm entirely confident that you are capable of doing great things.
To learn more on how to reinvent yourself, sign up for our email list!
Such an insightful & info backed post, thank you! I love the idea of asking yourself “what would future me eat for breakfast?” Such a light hearted question but great way to understand your needs better.